Monmouthshire Nursing Home Marks Resident’s Birthday with Special Cake and a Reflection on Her Life

Audrey, fondly known as Jingy (her childhood nickname), recently celebrated her 91st birthday at Gibraltar Nursing Home! To mark the occasion, the team made a special cake for her. House lead Dani decorated it with flowers and greenery, finishing it with a small dog figurine crafted from icing. For those who know Jingy, this detail was deeply meaningful.

Jingy lives with Small Vessel Disease and is on a cognitive journey. At times, this can affect how she interprets the world around her, how memories connect, and how she experiences certain situations. Her sense of reality can feel fluid, and she can experience periods of confusion.

When someone is on a cognitive journey, they may not always be able to verbalise what they need to feel safe or what is important to them. By taking time to understand someone’s life history, values, relationships and the experiences that have shaped them, care can be built around who they are, rather than focusing only on a diagnosis and what they may be experiencing.

Although cognitive conditions may cause memory changes and shifts in perception, there are often routines, traits and personal preferences that stay with us, so deeply ingrained that they do not fade. Jingy’s story shows how person-centred care can help someone feel seen, supported, and understood for who they are and what matters most to them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Earlier Life

Born in 1935, Jingy grew up as an only child in a small, terraced house in Stockport, Cheshire.

When she just was four years old, the Second World War began. Her father, a barber by trade, left to serve in the military in Africa, Italy and parts of Europe. He was away for four years, which was a long absence in a young child’s life. Her mother worked in a grocery shop and later contributed to the war effort by helping to manufacture munitions used in aircraft raids over Germany. During air raids over Manchester, Jingy spent time sheltering underground, like so many children of that generation.

Despite growing up during uncertain times, she thrived at school. She passed her exams to attend the local grammar school and was known for being both academic and sporty, playing a lot of netball.

After leaving school, she had a strong desire to travel, so got a job working as an air hostess with British Airways (known as British European Airways at the time!) She flew all over Europe and enjoyed meeting people from all walks of life. Presentation was very important in her role, and Jingy took pride in her appearance, always making sure her hair was tied back looking nice and tidy. Later, she worked for Courtauld’s, a retailer based in Manchester.

She met her future husband, Tony, through mutual friends who played hockey, tennis and football. He was 13 years older than her, and they married quite quickly when she was 26. They had a cottage in the countryside, which became a family home as they raised their son’s Mark and Adam.

They had lots of animals – cats, dogs, a donkey, rabbits and even a parrot! Some of their names were: Brandy (a poodle), Benjie, Mickey, Trudy, and a big black tom-cat cat called Twirley. Jingy also loved to feed the wild ducks in their garden with seeds and bread.

Around this time Jingy no longer had a formal job, but was a full-time parent to her boys. She was very much head of the household, and was quite strong on discipline, but deeply loving. The family would always have a big Sunday lunch together which Jingy loved cooking. She also loved gardening and pottering in her greenhouse.

Tony was a keen walker, and took them on many long walks into the hills at weekends, inspiring his son Mark’s love of hill-walking. Jingy used to drive them to the start and pick them all up at the end. This was the days before mobile phones, so many times they got lost or arrived very late which Jingy found quite worrying!

Their life was described as ‘idyllic’ by Mark. He shared memories of playing endlessly in the large garden with his brother Adam, their singing in the local church choir and playing cricket for the village.

Jingy was always very active socially and had a lot of friends that she held dear. She also looked after many older people in their neighbourhood, making Sunday lunches for several neighbours and doing shopping for them – caring for others was an intrinsic part of who she was.

After Tony sadly passed away in 2008, Jingy lived on her own for many years. In her early 80s she began to suffer with periods of ill-health which also impacted her cognition. These illnesses became more common as her mobility reduced, so Mark brought her down to Monmouth in 2019 and she lived in one of the two-bed apartments at Gibraltar Care Village (the residential village which shares the same grounds as the home), receiving at-home care. When she moved further along in her cognitive journey and began to need more full-time support, she moved into the nursing home where the team could provide her with consistent nursing care.

Life at Gibraltar

When Jingy moved into the nursing home, she brought with her a beloved soft toy dog. In Jingy’s world, he was not a toy. He was a real dog she had rescued, loved and healed. She spoke about him with tenderness, describing the difficult experiences he had endured before finding safety with her, and the care she had given him.

The team quickly learned that Jingy became unsettled if she could not see her dog, and was only reassured once he was returned to her. In moments of anxiety, talking about the dog often helped redirect and bring her back to a calmer place.

Today, Jingy takes care of three dogs. She calls them her ‘babies’ or her ‘lovely, adorable dogs.’ There was a time when she would even offer them food from her plate – a spoonful for her, and a spoonful for the dogs! One dog is battery-operated, barking and producing gentle sensory sounds, which helps Jingy to settle at night.

For Jingy, the dogs are constant companions, always by her side, offering reassurance and a sense of responsibility that feels deeply meaningful.

Her son Mark lives locally and brings his dog to visit, a terrier called Teddy, which Jingy adores. He also brings her a bunch of fresh flowers each week for on her windowsill; Jingy loves flowers, particularly roses and lilies.

Mark shared about his mum’s experience at the home: ‘The care at Gibraltar is great – the carers are lovely, and really engage with Jingy to make her feel at home. She has got to know many of them very well, and although she gets quite confused, they are all very understanding of her needs.’

Family members (residents) at Gibraltar have identity boards by their bedroom doors, put together by the team to reflect what matters most to each person including their likes, dislikes and the things that shape who they are.

For Jingy, a beautifully illustrated poster was created, capturing moments and memories from her life – her family, her time as an air hostess, her love of cooking and gardening, along with favourite foods, drinks and her adoration for dogs.

 

 

 

 

 

Although Jingy prefers to spend most of her days in bed with her dogs, having her hair tied back properly remains a very important part of her identity. She always wants her hair looking tidy when she is awake, whether she stays in bed or not — something the team make sure to support her with.

She enjoys looking at family photos when the team show them to her and likes to talk through them together. Family means everything to Jingy. Her children and grandchildren hold a special place in her heart, and she treasures memories of holidays spent with them. Aside from this, her dogs are her life, bringing her purpose and comfort every day.

Her birthday cake, decorated with a small icing dog, reflected something deeply rooted for Jingy. Identity does not disappear when someone is on a cognitive journey. Things may shift and be expressed differently, but the shape of who someone is, their loves, their habits, their sense of responsibility, often remains, sometimes in unexpected ways.

To read more stories about the people living and working at Gibraltar Nursing Home, please click here.